Parenting as Discipleship

A Christian’s greatest burden betrays his greatest weakness.  Take for example the challenges associated with raising children. Who comes to the parenting party fully or even partially equipped for the task? Parenting demands on-the-job-training. One thing all excellent parents have learned is just how woefully deficient they are when beginning. For this reason, biblical wisdom, tremendous patience, swift forgiveness and unconditional love make up the soil out of which successful parenting grows. Why must parenting be so hard? Why doesn’t God program children with an “easy” button or pre-wire them to simply become mature and productive? These same questions could also be asked regarding the task of making followers of Jesus. Discovering the answers to these questions reveals something of the character of God and what it means to live as His child. 

Jesus commanded the Apostles to “go...and make disciples.” (Matthew 28:19) Interestingly, the Greek verb, translated “make” in the NASB (New American Standard Bible) does not imply that force or duress will be required in order to carry out this command. One Biblical Lexicon (a dictionary) comments that it would be proper to translate the verse this way, “...convince them to become my disciples” or “urge them to be my disciples.” That is important for a few reasons. First, like raising kids, making disciples can be very challenging and therefore, frustrating. It is easy in a moment of frustration to become angry and then to try and use force or intimidation to bring about compliance. But, this is not becoming of a follower of God. Second, “making disciples,” in the sense described above, requires faith from start to finish. Anger and force are the product of human wisdom, not the fruit of the Spirit. When parents constantly badger and talk down to their kids, or when Church leaders use fear and shame to force their members into compliance, it is not faith that is being demonstrated, but a glaring lack of faith. Jesus Christ has promised in His word to meet every need of those who come to Him by faith. He commissioned His earliest followers to go and make disciples by the same methods that Jesus had used to convince them to follow Him. These methods were rich in grace, being experienced through patience, forgiveness and love. Finally, the “making of disciples” in the sense of urging or convincing reveals the heart of God. It may appear strange to imagine the God of Creation to be gentle and humble, yet that is precisely His nature. Jesus, in Matthew 11:29, says of Himself, “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart...” Whether parenting or making disciples, when it is done in the Spirit of Christ, the demeanor of the one urging will be neither angry nor false, but will be gentle and real. 

There are many similarities between parenting and discipleship, in fact parenting is truly a branch of discipleship. Both come with few directions, except to follow the Words to Whom both duties belong. Each requires grace and mercy and each hold the promise of producing godly offspring.

Growing in Weakness

Pastor Gibbs